In retrospect, I always was a naughty girl to my mom and dad, they never found me home when I finished school classes. On weekends, I was mostly play around with my lovely friends, the riverside, deep into the mountain, somewhere among the farm and rice field, there were tremendous fun when I was out with my friends, we played games, we explored the nature views and secretes, we played with insects and small animals, those good times were all the moments surrounded by good views, good friends, good spirit, and good vibes.
Until I finished primary school, things stated getting changed. Enter into middle high school means far more pressure on study and classes. Those good moments finally become memories in my life. I do not have more time and freedom to play around with my cute friends, but with my tedious homework and all the tests before final exams. If you have asked what is the meaning of growing up? I might say, accepting. Accepting all the facts and challenges you are going to have. For some moments, I have spent quite some time thinking why am I sitting in the classes and learning what I am not interested in at all. But on the other hand, some voice comes up from my mind that I must study hard to get a better future? But what is a better future? And how to define a future is better or not? Are there any standard for that? Are there any judgement for that? Those queries company me through my time when I was in school and now when I finished school and enter into another page of my life.
So I just keep on studying and focus on study, trying to get something expected from the society and parents. Finally I do have something accomplished, going to a good college and have obtained a degree. Afterwards, it is the work. Working looks much more different than just studying in a room or in a school. There are far more complicated questions to answer and there are no standard answers for that. I tried many times to find the answer, but always I lost in the end. In the process of finding the meaning of working, I gave up sometimes, I got myself together from time to time. I thought my dream job is not what I am doing right now, and I do not have the courage to find my dream job at the same time. What is dream job? No standard for that as well.
Hence, I keep looking, keep pursuing. As of this day, I am still looking for the meaning of work, and meaning of life more specifically. But I do not figure out what is the meaning of work and life yet. I do figure out the meaning of money, and that is my desired purpose right now. Working to make a living for myself, working to do what I want, working to meet all my needs other than just food. Working for money gradually washes away my original dream job, and becomes my aim in the end.
Currently, because I have been siting in front of my electric partner, computer for a long time, I feel my body pains. Back pains, shoulders pains, feet pains, eyes pains. Who knows? Working comes with pains in your body. There are all these pains make me painful and tired. But I am still working on it, I am sting sitting with my electric partner. What is lucky is two years ago another electric partner comes into my life, foot bath and massager, with which I have relieved my pain, my stress, my tiredness, my desperation.
It brings me back to the good old times with my adorable friends, I feel relaxed again, I feel happy again, I feel all the bliss brought by foot bath and massager. I am still working, making a living, and I am so please someone comes into my life that adds fun and relaxation, foot bath and massager.